Daily UX Writing Challenge
Day 2: Promotional screen for sports app.
Hi. I’m Izu. A Medical Radiographer and UX writer. This post is in response to the Daily UX Writing Challenge, and this is day 2 of 15.
UX Writing Challenge: Day 2
Scenario
A user is a working parent, and a big sports fan, in the midst of their favorite sports season who can no longer attend games.
Challenge
Write a promotional screen for an app that lets a user choose teams, sends game reminders, real-time score updates, and highlight videos.
Headline: 40 characters max
Body: 175 characters max
Button(s): 25 characters max
Goals
First of all, get the user’s attention.
Let the user know the important features of the app.
Let the user know what to do to get it.
Since this is a promotional copy, I know I’m meant to be promoting the app to a prospective user, who is yet to get the app, so I need to work on understanding the scenario very well. This would help in drafting what to write to get the user’s attention.
Copy
Headline — CAN’T MAKE THE GAME? FOLLOW THE ACTION.
Body: Get team news, matchday reminders, live scores, and video highlights of your favorite football teams, on your mobile phone. Anytime, anywhere, and FOR FREE.
Button: Kick-off with Footyzo.
Rationale
Can’t make the game? is simply conversational, and relevant to the user’s current situation; can no longer attend games. Follow the action carries a sporty, yet instructional tone, telling the user something to do if they cannot make the game. This was my attempt at getting the user’s attention.
I thought of other headlines while writing, like “Experience the game wherever you are!” (too bland, and not very conversational), “Can’t make the game? We’ve got you!” (It is advisable to avoid “we” as much as possible because the user is the main focus, not the app providers), and “Can’t make the game? Don’t worry.” (Don’t worry did not sound right), but I like the one I went with.
I didn’t try to write their actual situation into the copy in ways like addressing parenting, being very busy, or having a hectic work schedule. The reason is that whether or not a certain persona is given greater attention, the app is still designed for universal use, and adding those things would make the copy ineffective to people who don’t fit into that persona. We can’t guarantee that everybody that sees the promotional screen is going to be a working parent, so the copy should not be overly specific.
In the body, I listed the features of the app and made sure to add “…of your favorite football teams,” because that lets the user know that they would not be getting updates from all possible teams, only the teams they choose as their favorites.
I also added “…on your mobile phone” so it gets very obvious that it is a MOBILE app.
“Anytime, anywhere…” is just for emphasis, highlighting the ease of accessibility of the app features.
An assumption that the app is free would be an added incentive, an important one. The user is a working parent, and many such people might see payment for sports updates as an unnecessary luxury, as they might have other more important expenses. This can end the user journey before it even starts. Hence the need for me to highlight the fact that Footyzo is free. Note that the free feature of my app is my assumption, and not in the prompt.
The button is a Call To Action (CTA) that tells the user to get the app, using a fun sporting term: kick-off. I also included the brand name, for personalization. For example, Download Facebook sounds better than Download the app.
This challenge was quite confusing for me at first, but in the end, it was good. Kindly give feedback and pointers for improvement. I would appreciate it.
